So, ill just preface this journal by saying that I'm just trying to blow off steam about my living situation and don't really have any other venue. I've been living with my grandpa now for quite a while watching his heath deteriorate and his daily activity stagnate into watching the western channel almost all day every day (except when the local sports teams are on). That in and of itself wouldn't be unbearable, but what is pushing me over the edge is that my boyfriend, now fiance, moved in to grandpas house with me about a year and a half ago. And earlier this year, my mom was laid off because of cut backs at her job so shes been here for almost 3/4 of the year already. With all of us here I am really stressed out! I'm trying my damndest to get more freelance work coloring (which was going well until this month when mom came back again) so that we can save up money to move out. But every time the topic of moving up comes about she pulls a pity part saying then she would have to move in with her dad. My argument, at least for the last 4 or so months, has been that if she doesn't want him here by hisself maybe he shouldn't stay at home. He was in a care home earlier this year for physical therapy and while he was there he was such a different person. He got waited on hand and foot (served 3 meals in a timely manner every day; got assistance with personal hygene; etc) and loved every damn minute of it. But because the care home wouldn't let him have his damn dog he threw a fit to come home. Most of my family doesn't think he should still be living at home, but my mom has got blinders on. I am just so sad and stressed all the time that it is negatively affecting my relationship with my fiance. I feel like we have almost zero personal time to enjoy each others company and I feel like planning our wedding in this environment is going to be impossible.
I really just don't know what to right now. And feel like I cant reach out to anyone in my family for fear of causing huge and painful fights. Egh. I just want to be happy and cant seem to find the silver lining of this situation.